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uTango: Earn $1,000,000 for Shopping Online?

utangoMany sites offer reward programs for clicking on links to retailers from their site (eBates, for example). Typically, you are offered a reward or rebate equal to 1%, 2%, 5% or more of the purchase price of items you buy through those links.

Now comes uTango which promises (with their fingers crossed) to pay you up to $1,000,000 for shopping on their site. A million dollars!?

million $

What’s the catch? (As if there was only one.)

*MOUSE PRINT:

Members can earn … extraordinary LifeStage Cash Rewards up to … $1 Million at 30 years [emphasis added] in return for your long-term loyalty.

That’s right, if you want to earn the million dollars, you have to sign up for a 30-year plan. After 30 years of faithful compliance, your money will be paid out as an annuity over 10 more years. So, how much do you have to buy per year to qualify for the million buck rebate?

*MOUSE PRINT:

chart

They say you have to spend roughly $20,000 a year through their site in order to collect the required 120,000 points annually. Given that 40% of consumers can’t even follow through to mail in a simple rebate form for items they buy now, what are the odds that shoppers can follow through on this scheme for 30 years?

Just to make sure the company doesn’t have to pay out a lot of money 10, 20, or 30 years from now, they have a few other strings in their program rules and member agreement that could trip you up.

*MOUSE PRINT: (paraphrasing)

To qualify for the 10, 20, and 30 year bonuses, members must be married, and they have to sign up for the program when they have been married for less than three years.

To remain eligible for the big payouts, married members must “Stay Married for the duration of the LifeStage Rewards Plan. ”

If the couple fails to earn the required number of points for two consecutive years, they can be deactivated from the program.

And just in case the 50% divorce rate, and the expensive task of always earning 120,000 points a year (which can be adjusted upward for inflation, believe it or not) isn’t enough to disqualify you, they have two final tricks up their sleeve.

*MOUSE PRINT:

The program is subject to “change at anytime” and

“REWARDS UNDER THE PROGRAM ARE NOT GUARANTEED”

With so much at stake, and so many potential pitfalls, not the least of which is whether this company will be around 30 years from now, you might better utilize the cash back provisions of other reward programs that pay you back shortly after you make a purchase.

Update: The above story was written in September 2008. As of January 31, 2009, the announcement below is posted on the uTango website:

utangolet

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Hyundai Assurance: Lose Your Income, Return the Car

Hyundai AssuranceIn early January, in order to stimulate car sales in a weak economy, Hyundai announced a novel program called Hyundai Assurance.  According to the TV commercial :

“Right now, buy any new Hyundai. And if, in the next year, you lose your income, we’ll let you return it.” (There is unreadable mouse print in the ad when those words are spoken.)

While this may sound like a refund program to some, it is not.

*MOUSE PRINT:

This is actually a lease cancellation or loan cancellation program, and does not apply to customers who buy their cars outright.  In essence, they will let you return the car, under six specific circumstances, and will cancel your continued indebtedness.  There is no refund of any money.

In particular, they look at what your car is worth when you turn it in, and compare it to what you owe.  Hyundai will waive up to a $7500 difference, and you have to pay the rest.

Under what circumstances can you return the car?  These are the six reasons:

Involuntary unemployment, physical disability, loss of driver’s license, international employment transfer, self-employment personal bankruptcy, and accident death.

Written like an insurance policy, each of these reasons has a list of limiting qualifications. For example, to qualify for the unemployment benefit, you have to be employed full time for at least three months before and after the policy begins; you have to be approved for state unemployment insurance (or an alternative option); you can’t be self-employed, have retired or resigned, or have gotten a new job; etc.

How does Mouse Print* know all these deep details?  Certainly not from watching Hyundai’s television commercial or reading their website set up specifically for this program.  When Mouse Print* asked the plan administrator for all the terms and conditions and legalese, we were directed to go to any Hyundai dealer.  Calling a nearby dealer, the sales manager acknowledged he did not yet have the terms and conditions to give to customers and only had a flowery brochure.  Even initial contact with Hyundai’s press relations folks turned into a dead end.  Finally, a copy of the terms and conditions  [pdf] was provided by the plan administrator’s PR person.

No potential customer who is going to spend $15,000, $20,000, $30,000 or more should have to beg and grovel with company officials to learn the details of a program being promoted via a multi-million dollar ad campaign.  In the end, if you meet the nitpicky qualifications, this is a good bit of free (non) insurance to have when buying a new car given our uncertain times.

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Kleenex Tissues Downsized

Paper products like toilet paper and paper towels have been downsized frequently. Now tissues are getting smaller too.

*MOUSE PRINT:

kleenex184

Kleenex has narrowed their tissues by two-tenths of an inch, from 8.4 inches wide to 8.2 inches, but the boxes are the same size. That is over 300 square inches less per box.

In addition, an eagle-eyed Mouse Print* reader (MaterialGirl) noticed that on the 120 count boxes the company made each tissue smaller AND reduced the number of tissues in the box to 110:

kleenex120

What does the company have to say about the downsizing?

In recent months, we have been faced with escalating prices for pulp and rapidly changing energy costs. Similar to other manufacturers, we cannot absorb these increased costs indefinitely without making an adjustment. While one of our competitors recently increased their price by six percent, we chose to maintain our existing price but decreased the number of sheets in some cartons. This direction allows us to offer lower promotional prices.

Also, we recently adjusted the sheet to a size equal to other tissues currently on the market, standardizing the sheet size in the facial tissue category. —Kimberly-Clark Customer Service

Although most shoppers won’t miss the two-tenths of inch from each tissue, for the company, the savings are nothing to sneeze at.

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