Humor

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No Joke: What You Can and Can’t Take On a Plane May Surprise You

Just in time for April Fools’ Day…. TSA’s fine print of what you can take and not onboard an airplane may give you a chuckle.

MrConsumer was planning a trip to Washington, DC and intended to take a jar of peanut butter in his carry-on luggage as a snack at the hotel. Since he had not flown in a while, he decided to check the TSA website to see what was allowed and not allowed onboard.

Looking at TSA’s list of hundreds of items that people may have questions about bringing on airplanes, revealed a surprise:

*MOUSE PRINT:

peanut butter

Apparently, peanut butter comes under TSA’s “liquid rule” that bans liquids, gels, pastes, creams, and aerosols greater than 3.4 ounces. So my jar of peanut butter is out as a carry-on item.

Even if I packed an 18-ounce jar that had only three ounces of peanut butter on the bottom, I would be out of luck because of the TSA’s liquids rule says that even if there is less than 3.4 ounces of liquid, if the container is larger than that, it is a forbidden item in carry-ons.

Perusing TSA’s list has some unexpected surprises of what is allowed and not allowed in your carry-on bag.

*MOUSE PRINT:

ALLOWED:

Antlers
Bread machines
Camp stoves
Cowboy spurs
Duct tape and rope
Espresso makers
Knitting needles
Light Saber
Safety matches
Scissors (less than 4″)
Screwdrivers (less than 7″)
Shock collars

DISALLOWED:

Bowling pins
Cast iron cookware
Cream cheese (over 3.4 oz)
Pam cooking spray
Drill bits
English Christmas crackers
Foam toy swords
Magic 8 Ball
Rocket launchers (duh)
Safety razor with blades
Samsung Galaxy Note 7
Spray deodorant (over 3.4 oz)
Toothpaste (over 3.4 oz)

And to prove the TSA has a sense of humor, here is how they describe one particular banned item:

Magic 8 ball

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Thanks for Nothing – Winter 2025

A few times a year we spotlight offers from companies that are real head-scratchers, are actually less generous than they appear, are just plain outrageous, or may simply elicit a chuckle. Here’s the new crop.

California Olive Oil

Rosemarie L. sent us this picture of two 100% extra virgin olive oil bottles from her local Shaw’s supermarket.

California olive oil

The one on the right, California Olive Ranch, was a dollar cheaper so she thought she would buy that one. That is until she read the bottom of the label.

*MOUSE PRINT:

10% California olive oil

Unlike the Signature store brand which is 100% from California, this one is only 10% from there. Thanks for nothing, California Olive Ranch.

American Blueberries

Tim C. wrote to us about this package of blueberries saying “it certainly leads you to believe you’re buying American-grown produce at first glance.

*MOUSE PRINT:

American Blueberries

We agree. Thanks for nothing, American Blueberries, Inc.

Macy’s Black Friday Sale

Back in August, we complained about Wayfair’s problematic search engine that returned over 9,000 results when looking for a blood pressure monitor when in fact they only had 10 real listings.

Well, what Macy’s did last month during their Black Friday sale makes Wayfair’s tech people look like geniuses.

*MOUSE PRINT:

Macy's Black Friday sale

Even the most ardent bargain hunter will not go through over 150,000 sale items in search of a great deal. Thanks for nothing, Macy’s.

Get $5 Off Any P&G Product?

MrConsumer was very excited to get this email from Procter & Gamble seemingly promising $5 off on any item. That is what the email subject said, and that is what the big print said in the body of the email.

P&G Save $5

Only in smaller print in the email did P&G reveal the true nature of the offer. They weren’t offering a $5 off coupon, but rather…

*MOUSE PRINT:

P&G Save $5 finer print

Thanks for nothing, P&G.

OmegaXL – Satisfaction Guaranteed?

Many mail order products come with a free trial or a satisfaction or your money back guarantee to help consumers feel better about trying something new. This joint supplement called OmegaXL has a most unusual policy, however.

*MOUSE PRINT:

OmegaXL guarantee

If you tried it and you were not satisfied, you can’t return it because their policy requires that the package must be unopened and unused.

Thanks for nothing, OmegaXL.

If you find a product policy, offer, or advertisement suitable for this section, please send it along to Edgar (at symbol) MousePrint.org . Thanks.

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Blue Diamond Doesn’t Stick to Its Durability Claims

Blue Diamond waffle platesWhen we buy nonstick cookware, many shoppers want the coating to last as long as possible. So manufacturers try to convince us of how durable their brand is.

In a website ad for Blue Diamond waffle plates for a its griddle, the company can’t seem to get its numbers straight.

First it says its diamond-infused coating delivers five times more strength and lasts 10 times longer.

Blue Diamond 5x-10x

Then it changes the numbers. Ten times longer wasn’t enough, so someone at the company probably suggested let’s say 50 times stronger and six times harder.

Blue Diamond 50x

But then, there’s the old asterisk after those numbers. And the claims change again.

*MOUSE PRINT:

Fine Print

Lasts longer, more strength, more durable, harder… 5x, 10x, 6x, 50x… it almost feels like the company is pulling numbers out of thin air. And that makes their claims at least two times harder to believe.